Precious Days In The Sun

Days like these are my favorite. Where the sun is perched high in the sky like a hawk (of which we have plenty, just ask out chickens) and clouds float by but not daring to cover the sun.

Days like these where you constantly ask to go outside and all I can do is give into you because I remember that I loved the outside too. There’s nothing more grounding than feeling the dirt, bare feet on the grass, feeling the ions of the Earth seep into our bones. Feeling God in the Earth.

Last Sunday a friend invited us to her church for Easter and I fell in love so I went again with her today. I realize that the tradition of Church on Sunday mornings is good for us because it gives us something to look forward to. Like that quote says, Happiness is: something to do, someone to love, and something to look forward too. Sometimes the days are long, hard, and heavy — especially living with depression. I find myself looking forward to Church next Sunday. Wondering what songs we’ll sing and what we’ll read in the Bible. This is all kind of new to me even though I grew up Catholic. I realized that I never really spent time with the Bible and maybe at my tender age of 33 it’s never too late to start.

Today we read John 21:11 and the passage that stuck out to me was: “Early in the morning, Jesus stood on the shore, but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.”

I just kept reading that one line over and over: “but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.” It made me think of all the times in my life that I didn’t realize that something that was happening to me was actually Divine intervention, and that maybe we look up shores, and trees, and grassy fields and we don’t realize that it’s Jesus.

If anything can make you feel the love of Jesus, it’s the love for a child. A pure, enigmatic love. It feels whole, complete.

Today was just one of those special days. Archie and I played in the dirt and felt the sun on our faces. His overalls, a few sizes too big, looked somehow perfect on his little body.

I’m not sure who reads blogs anymore but I’m actually kind of glad for it. A quiet corner of the Internet where I can explore the art of writing again, something I used to love to do so much. A no pressure space, no hashtags or trending audio. A special space that maybe one day when Archie’s old enough he can read about how much I love him.